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Old 09-07-09, 02:25 AM
Jason R's Avatar
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: San Antonio
Posts: 6,768
5 Cobra Commander Plots

That Might Actually Work.

An excerpt:

The Great Alaskan Land Rush - Episode Summaries > Season 1 > The Great Alaskan Land Rush - Notes "Who are you?"
"The new owner of Alaska, hockey puck!"
The Plot:
Cobra Commander attempts to take over Alaska; not through force of arms, but by using a little-known loophole in William Seward's original treaty that gives legal ownership of the state to whoever has possession of the state seal--presumably rechristening it as Cobralaska and making it the first step in eventual world domination. This, as you might imagine, is a fairly stupid plan.
Why It Might've Worked:
The idea of a babbling laughingstock wrestling power away from the U.S. Government using an obscure and possibly fictitious clause in a state document might've seemed like a stretch in the 80s, but that's pretty much exactly what Texas Governor Rick Perry was doing when he started advocating secession based on something he essentially made up. Once again, Cobra Commander was decades ahead of his time.
As for the people of Alaska, well, they would later go on to elect Gubernatorial Beauty Queen Sarah Palin, elevating her from her status as the former mayor of the state's meth capital to a historic Vice Presidential campaign that brought her perilously close to actually running the United States of America before she lost and decided it was better to quit than to lose a basketball game. Or something like that. Point being, the rest of us are starting to get the idea that Alaskans might just be into girls who wear glasses and have goofy accents, and trust us: Cobra's got that one covered.

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Old 09-07-09, 03:07 AM
Dulce's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 13,524

ok that's just scary.!!!

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